Justice works hand in hand with forgiveness. Together will bring healing. Both are processes. In my opinion, true forgiveness through praying for your enemy works. It is recommended by most faith practices which follow Jesus. However, justice can not be left out. Jesus teaches that too.
Both words are often misunderstood.
Words will irritate at stressful times. No one really needs to tell you that.
I think I have made it clear in Stopping School Violence One Teacher's Silent Scream how much words matter. What words bother you? What words comfort you? What words inspire? What words shut you down? What words do you regret saying? What words do you wish you had uttered sooner? What words will you never apologize for? What words leave you wanting?
Or is it the lack of words that matter?
"I was just joking." Bothers me
"I love you to infinity and beyond." Comforts me.
"With Liberty and justice for all.." That phrase inspires me. And did in 1998 also.
"We didn't think it could happened here." Irritates me.
When "it happens here" no matter what you thought, justice and forgiveness need to forge a strong bond. Some words in press conferences or prepared statements fall flat
Justice sometimes involves street justice. Some street justice happened on Thursday in Bend, Oregon. There was no trial. A crime was being commited. One gun was used for vengeance. The other gun was used for justice. There is a moral and legal difference.
Alexa, what is the definition of justice? Alexa says in part, "justice means treating people fairly. Giving people what is do. It is moral treatment and legal process." She gave examples. Alexa, who is AI, gave police shootings as examples of legal justice.
I agree with Alexa. I also agree that the father who intervened on Thursday, per news reports, was just in his actions. Not that my opinion matters. Or does it?
The shooter had to be stopped. The police were not there. He should never say, "I am sorry." He did the best he could at a stressful time. Per news reports, I label him as a "Good Shepherd". On some level I can understsnd his mixed emotions. I had them in 1998 and I used a pen.
Words and actions matter before, during and after a conflict.
Fonzi had a hard time with saying I am sorry. The movie "Love Story" had the famous line about love mean never having to say you are sorry." Does it work in reality? Forgiveness does not mean anyone has to say "Sorry".
Do you remember as a kid being told to say you are sorry? Did it irritate you?
The father should not apologize.
I will not apologize for speaking truth. I often do not say everything that is on my mind believe it or not! Sometimes I am told "it is the way you say it." My story explains.
I bet the mother of the shooter is in the regret stage. (Pattern are predictable after a school attacks.) Is it because she lacks words, will need to shut down for legal proceedings, for what she failed to say, or what she did say? I am sure she feeling some type of sorry.
Did she say something to her son that morning that irritated him, that triggered him? She used "good boy" per news reports to describe him. Was he? Did he go on a suicide mission and knew schools are a good place to be taken out if you fire into the school? Even he will be forgiven in some minds. The mother will be too if she has to handle some legal justice. She is in that dreaded mother's club now.
Without being soft on crime, was the shooter a victim too before he became a murderer? It seems, if he lived, mitigating factors would count, but jailed for life would be justice.
Forgiveness will come, but time is needed. Documents, testimonies, trial (?) of mother, trial of someone in education at the killer's school (,?) (no school, that will matter), court of public opinion will factor in. Civil lawsuits will happen. They should. Lawsuits are part of it all.
Forgiveness involves expecting a better outcome and holding people accountable. It does involve kindness which should not be confused with "that's ok honey." I have a post on that.
I have sought justice and offered forgiveness. Some people, after justice, I can now be in the same room with and care for. I forgave my former administrator. But that does not mean I will ever forget. They were wrong. They could have been dead wrong.
Praying for your enemy may never change your enemy, it changes you.
Words matter and can impact a lifetime.
"When justice and peace meet. When the lion lays down with the lamb". Jesus spoke figuratively. He spoke of wolves in sheeps" clothing too.
A wolve killed lambs the other day. Jesus wept. Legal street justice protected more.
Maybe one day, if the current reports are true, the father, carpenter by trade they say, will be welcomed by the Master Carpenter with a thank you.
Justice, forgiveness and words matter for all.
Sometimes the pen is needed. Sometimes a gun speaks louder. Which works better in prevention? Alexa, remind the reader what prevention means She said read other posts.
Have you watched The Sheep Detectives yet? After you watch it, you will know why I ask?
Here is a link! You will laugh and cry! Justice prevails. Who is a Good Shepherd?
https://youtube.com/shorts/hYkHmEAEcDg?is=x7pdpCwdtHTYqTNY
From the Teacher's Desk with love,
Marian R. Carlino
October 20, 2026