For over 20 years now since the administration and school board in Northfield, NJ retaliated against me for seeking help for us to deal with a violent child ( read other posts), there have been many school shootings. Some have been massacres. The survivors have predictable responses in grief. But they are victims and see in a limited view. Some only see the weapon used. The world wants an easy fix. There is no easy fix. The weapons are not to blame.
Three newspapers, Denver Post, Hartford Courant, and now the Sun Sentinel out of Broward County, Florida have done research, filed open record lawsuits, and have published articles which should open some minds.
If you are a teacher, an administrator, school board member, have kids, or care one iota about your community, you should read what these newspapers have and continue to report. The next shooter reads. Mental illness or evil genius, the shooters do their research too.
The Sun Sentinel is reporting on reports that point to what I said 20 years ago.
Do you want others to read about the incompetence in your school district after a massacre?
Homicidal/suicidal maniacs bring suffering. It is not painless and it is not of God.
The prophets and those who can see the handwriting on the wall...listen to them.
Marian R. Carlino
12/29/2018
Sunday, December 30, 2018
Sunday, November 18, 2018
Perjurer Answers to God
Editorial published in the AC Press..12/22/1998
There has been much talk lately about President Clinton and whether or not perjury was committed. Debate t.v. is rampant with attorneys- defense and prosecutors- arguing their points. Polls state that the general public wants to move on and forgive, even if he did commit perjury. But forgiveness is a process, and in most relationships, it takes more than one for the forgiving process to work.
Legally, perjury is defined as "an actor, in any official proceeding, while under oath or equivalent affirmation, making a false statement or swearing or affirming the truth of a statement previously made, when the statement was material and the actor did not believe it to be true." That is the legal definition.
But since our judicial system is rife with human error, someone can lie straight faced and get away with it.
However, there is one source of justice that the actor must eventually face One of the 10 Commandments states that we are not to bear false witness against our neighbor. However, on judgment day, those who believe in a God of justice should be aware that you may have answer to Him if you haven't made amends.
The tricky part is, none of us know when that day will be. Maybe we all need to remember that today is not the first day of the rest of our lives but it may indeed also be the last. Those who protect and know the actor lied are responsible too.
Marian R. Carlino
12/22/1998.
There has been much talk lately about President Clinton and whether or not perjury was committed. Debate t.v. is rampant with attorneys- defense and prosecutors- arguing their points. Polls state that the general public wants to move on and forgive, even if he did commit perjury. But forgiveness is a process, and in most relationships, it takes more than one for the forgiving process to work.
Legally, perjury is defined as "an actor, in any official proceeding, while under oath or equivalent affirmation, making a false statement or swearing or affirming the truth of a statement previously made, when the statement was material and the actor did not believe it to be true." That is the legal definition.
But since our judicial system is rife with human error, someone can lie straight faced and get away with it.
However, there is one source of justice that the actor must eventually face One of the 10 Commandments states that we are not to bear false witness against our neighbor. However, on judgment day, those who believe in a God of justice should be aware that you may have answer to Him if you haven't made amends.
The tricky part is, none of us know when that day will be. Maybe we all need to remember that today is not the first day of the rest of our lives but it may indeed also be the last. Those who protect and know the actor lied are responsible too.
Marian R. Carlino
12/22/1998.
Saturday, November 10, 2018
Mandated Reporting- CYS not CYA
Many are under the misguided information that only professionals are responsible for submitting reports on suspected child abuse. Read state laws- are you over 18?
In 2005, after heading back into the workforce, I decided I wanted to work in child assault prevention so I started working with a child assault prevention program that worked in schools- public and private and in Catholic religious education programs. I had heard about it because as a volunteer in the Catholic Church, I had to undergo background checks and training as a direct result of the clergy abuse scandal. As a former public school teacher, I experienced background checks. I also, at the time in 2005, had just started working with a federally funded program for at risk youth at a local community college. Employers do background checks.
The overall response to people going into schools to address the issue of child assault prevention was a mixed bag. Some teachers were very welcoming and some just thought we were wasting the time he or she would have to teach. Hey, as a former classroom and LRC teacher, I got it. I was possessive of the time I had to teach as well,but I always shared "my kids" with others. I didn't think that others didn't have information to offer. Ask Andy, she shared my classroom as she came in as LRC teacher in 1996-97 and 1997-98. I have thank you notes from her to prove it!
As a facilitator for NJCAP, I presented workshops (all memorized script) to adults and children. I even presented to friends in their classrooms and in my former school district of Northfield, NJ. Like any bell curve event in life, some take the information to mind and heart, others ignore.
The bell curve of life- some are at one extreme or the other at least once in awhile but most of the time, we straddle in the middle.
For over two years, I worked with NJCAP. The underlying concept of the program started as a result of children reporting on rape. A dedicated group of people got it started. Most of us worked part time- per hour wages. The administration were the only full time staff.
As workshop presenters we worked under the guidance of the area coordinator. The one I worked under was a great presenter and knowledgeable. The presentations were scripted but based on research and data. The presentations were scripted and the answers to questions- scripted for the most part. The presentations had to be uniform for various reasons. I had no trouble with the script.
My coworkers and I were willing to work part time. Some were retired teachers, a retired probation officer, a retired nurse, a retired DYFS worker, one an aspiring actress and wife of a wealthy casino investor/operator, and one who needed a job- and a parent looking for part time work. We all worked well together. Our coordinator had no formal education beyond high school.
After our presentations, we would go out into the hallway to review with any child who wanted to talk to us separately. Most of the time, it was review. But sometimes, reports had to be made because of disclosures. Some warranted school personal being advised. Others, also involved notifying the 800 child assault line. Again, there was protocol to follow.
NJCAP is funded and dependent on schools inviting the group in. Schools are protective of their secrets so not all schools wanted a prevention/intervention program to enter its doors. Parents could opt out if they did not want their children in the presentations. Some teachers even could opt out. Those teachers who opted out, one would wonder why?
In February 2008, a co-facilitator made a call to DYFS. It was a good call. But it became controversial when the person/offender of interest took offense. NJCAP broke their own protocol with speaking with the person on a phone. At the school, on another visit, we were put on a limited lock down. The irate person wanted to come and talk to the reporters.
At the end of that day, I told our coordinator that the administration of NJCAP had broken protocol.
They must have discussed our conversation. The coordinator told me that day that a policy to get permission to report was going to be instituted. I told her to read the law and if I thought I had a report, I would go outside the school building and report.
The next day, a new policy was instituted. ( before and must were underlined by the coordinator who sent it out)
February 2008
"It shall be the policy of the Atlantic/Cape May Project that before any facilitator makes a report to DYFS or the local prosecutor, he/she must contact (insert name of coordinator), County Coordinator.
If the Coordinator is not available, the facilitator will contact NJCAP Regional Training Center at (insert phone number of center).
Failure to comply with this policy will result in dismissal and decertification of said facilitator."
(Please note: Prosecutor's office is called when the accused is an employee of the district or diocese.)
Once the new policy came out, I asked if they read the statute on mandated reporters. I took myself off the active roster until they received an attorney review. The administrators would not do one and told me - "they thought I had been easy to work with" (until then) but could not afford an attorney review. Their mistake. My fellow facilitators were absolute cowards in this. They did not like the new policy but followed it,putting themselves and the abused children at risk.
I contacted the prosecutors office and the diocesan offices. I have the letters. The administrators of NJCAP refused to get a legal perspective , but the prosecutors office and the Camden Diocesan office were concerned.
The Atlantic county prosecutor contacted me in writing and forwarded my concerns to the Camden Diocese. Eventually, NJCAP had to modify the new policy.
On March 10, 2008 a update policy was given to facilitators:
It noted NJ State Law (N.J.S.A 9:6-8.10) requires "Any person having reasonable cause to believe that a child has been subjected to child abuse or acts of child abuse shall report the same immediately to the Division of Youth and Family Services by telephone at 1-800-830-9234" l 1971, c. 437, s 3; amended by L.1987, c.341, c4
"It shall be the policy of NJCAP that a CAP facilitator, upon hearing a disclosure which rising to the level of abuse, shall immediately report the incident to DYFS/Prosecutor's Office. The report will be made in conjunction with the school contact person so that DYFS will be able to obtain personal information on and ongoing support for the student.
If the CAP facilitator would like to confer with the CAP County Coordinator he/she may do so as along as this does not interfere with the immediacy of the report or the direct reporting by the person who received the initial disclosure.
If the coordinator is not available, the facilitator may contact NJ CAP Regional Training Center at (insert phone number here).
After the call has been made to DYFA/Prosecutor's Office, the CAP facilitator must inform the CAP County Coordinator of the report if this has not already been done and so ensure that the Coordinator may respond to any DYFS or school inquiries on the case." (IMMEDIATELY WAS IN BOLD PRINT- I PUT IT IN RED SO TO DRAW IT TO THE READER'S ATTENTION AS I HAVE BOLDED THE NEW POLICIES.)
JUST LIKE THE ADMINISTRATORS IN SCHOOLS, THE CATHOLIC CHURCH AND OTHER ORGANIZATIONS, THE COORDINATOR TRIED TO BLAME THE REPORTERS (I WAS NOT THE REPORTER ON THIS ONE BUT SUPPORTED THE REPORTER). THE COORDINATOR WAS AFRAID OF NJCAP'S REPUTATION BEING SULLIED BY TOO MANY REPORTS AS HER EMAIL TO ME STATED AFTER A FACILITATORS MEETING ON THE ISSUE AT HER HOUSE.
On April 14, 2008, I received a thank you letter from the Camden Catholic Diocese Director of Safe Environment for Children, Youth and Adults. He said the modified policy is well done and he said he appreciated my concerns regarding this.
I live in another state and city now, but before I moved from south Jersey, I ran into the Coordinator as her role continued with NJCAP. I did her a favor at that time in 2008.
Not long after that, people who worked for DYFS were going to trial for not doing their jobs in saving the lives of children.
Are you a mandated reporter? Find out. Years ago in schools it also used to be policy for a teacher to have to report to the principal first. Thank goodness that policy is no longer in effect- it wasn't even in effect in 2008.
Reporters are not investigators- that is the job of the police, DYFS or whatever the agency in your state is called. You may know it by CYS.. it is not called - CYA.
NJCAP continues to work in the schools. It is needed and is an international organization. I never asked for the "head of the coordinator", I asked for a change in policy. Reasonable heads prevailed. And I could look my former co-workers in the eye with honesty. I received thank you notes and words of thanks from them too.
Are you an advocate for children? You don't need a classroom to teach.
Marian R. Carlino
November 10, 2018
In 2005, after heading back into the workforce, I decided I wanted to work in child assault prevention so I started working with a child assault prevention program that worked in schools- public and private and in Catholic religious education programs. I had heard about it because as a volunteer in the Catholic Church, I had to undergo background checks and training as a direct result of the clergy abuse scandal. As a former public school teacher, I experienced background checks. I also, at the time in 2005, had just started working with a federally funded program for at risk youth at a local community college. Employers do background checks.
The overall response to people going into schools to address the issue of child assault prevention was a mixed bag. Some teachers were very welcoming and some just thought we were wasting the time he or she would have to teach. Hey, as a former classroom and LRC teacher, I got it. I was possessive of the time I had to teach as well,but I always shared "my kids" with others. I didn't think that others didn't have information to offer. Ask Andy, she shared my classroom as she came in as LRC teacher in 1996-97 and 1997-98. I have thank you notes from her to prove it!
As a facilitator for NJCAP, I presented workshops (all memorized script) to adults and children. I even presented to friends in their classrooms and in my former school district of Northfield, NJ. Like any bell curve event in life, some take the information to mind and heart, others ignore.
The bell curve of life- some are at one extreme or the other at least once in awhile but most of the time, we straddle in the middle.
For over two years, I worked with NJCAP. The underlying concept of the program started as a result of children reporting on rape. A dedicated group of people got it started. Most of us worked part time- per hour wages. The administration were the only full time staff.
As workshop presenters we worked under the guidance of the area coordinator. The one I worked under was a great presenter and knowledgeable. The presentations were scripted but based on research and data. The presentations were scripted and the answers to questions- scripted for the most part. The presentations had to be uniform for various reasons. I had no trouble with the script.
My coworkers and I were willing to work part time. Some were retired teachers, a retired probation officer, a retired nurse, a retired DYFS worker, one an aspiring actress and wife of a wealthy casino investor/operator, and one who needed a job- and a parent looking for part time work. We all worked well together. Our coordinator had no formal education beyond high school.
After our presentations, we would go out into the hallway to review with any child who wanted to talk to us separately. Most of the time, it was review. But sometimes, reports had to be made because of disclosures. Some warranted school personal being advised. Others, also involved notifying the 800 child assault line. Again, there was protocol to follow.
NJCAP is funded and dependent on schools inviting the group in. Schools are protective of their secrets so not all schools wanted a prevention/intervention program to enter its doors. Parents could opt out if they did not want their children in the presentations. Some teachers even could opt out. Those teachers who opted out, one would wonder why?
In February 2008, a co-facilitator made a call to DYFS. It was a good call. But it became controversial when the person/offender of interest took offense. NJCAP broke their own protocol with speaking with the person on a phone. At the school, on another visit, we were put on a limited lock down. The irate person wanted to come and talk to the reporters.
At the end of that day, I told our coordinator that the administration of NJCAP had broken protocol.
They must have discussed our conversation. The coordinator told me that day that a policy to get permission to report was going to be instituted. I told her to read the law and if I thought I had a report, I would go outside the school building and report.
The next day, a new policy was instituted. ( before and must were underlined by the coordinator who sent it out)
February 2008
"It shall be the policy of the Atlantic/Cape May Project that before any facilitator makes a report to DYFS or the local prosecutor, he/she must contact (insert name of coordinator), County Coordinator.
If the Coordinator is not available, the facilitator will contact NJCAP Regional Training Center at (insert phone number of center).
Failure to comply with this policy will result in dismissal and decertification of said facilitator."
(Please note: Prosecutor's office is called when the accused is an employee of the district or diocese.)
Once the new policy came out, I asked if they read the statute on mandated reporters. I took myself off the active roster until they received an attorney review. The administrators would not do one and told me - "they thought I had been easy to work with" (until then) but could not afford an attorney review. Their mistake. My fellow facilitators were absolute cowards in this. They did not like the new policy but followed it,putting themselves and the abused children at risk.
I contacted the prosecutors office and the diocesan offices. I have the letters. The administrators of NJCAP refused to get a legal perspective , but the prosecutors office and the Camden Diocesan office were concerned.
The Atlantic county prosecutor contacted me in writing and forwarded my concerns to the Camden Diocese. Eventually, NJCAP had to modify the new policy.
On March 10, 2008 a update policy was given to facilitators:
It noted NJ State Law (N.J.S.A 9:6-8.10) requires "Any person having reasonable cause to believe that a child has been subjected to child abuse or acts of child abuse shall report the same immediately to the Division of Youth and Family Services by telephone at 1-800-830-9234" l 1971, c. 437, s 3; amended by L.1987, c.341, c4
"It shall be the policy of NJCAP that a CAP facilitator, upon hearing a disclosure which rising to the level of abuse, shall immediately report the incident to DYFS/Prosecutor's Office. The report will be made in conjunction with the school contact person so that DYFS will be able to obtain personal information on and ongoing support for the student.
If the CAP facilitator would like to confer with the CAP County Coordinator he/she may do so as along as this does not interfere with the immediacy of the report or the direct reporting by the person who received the initial disclosure.
If the coordinator is not available, the facilitator may contact NJ CAP Regional Training Center at (insert phone number here).
After the call has been made to DYFA/Prosecutor's Office, the CAP facilitator must inform the CAP County Coordinator of the report if this has not already been done and so ensure that the Coordinator may respond to any DYFS or school inquiries on the case." (IMMEDIATELY WAS IN BOLD PRINT- I PUT IT IN RED SO TO DRAW IT TO THE READER'S ATTENTION AS I HAVE BOLDED THE NEW POLICIES.)
JUST LIKE THE ADMINISTRATORS IN SCHOOLS, THE CATHOLIC CHURCH AND OTHER ORGANIZATIONS, THE COORDINATOR TRIED TO BLAME THE REPORTERS (I WAS NOT THE REPORTER ON THIS ONE BUT SUPPORTED THE REPORTER). THE COORDINATOR WAS AFRAID OF NJCAP'S REPUTATION BEING SULLIED BY TOO MANY REPORTS AS HER EMAIL TO ME STATED AFTER A FACILITATORS MEETING ON THE ISSUE AT HER HOUSE.
On April 14, 2008, I received a thank you letter from the Camden Catholic Diocese Director of Safe Environment for Children, Youth and Adults. He said the modified policy is well done and he said he appreciated my concerns regarding this.
I live in another state and city now, but before I moved from south Jersey, I ran into the Coordinator as her role continued with NJCAP. I did her a favor at that time in 2008.
Not long after that, people who worked for DYFS were going to trial for not doing their jobs in saving the lives of children.
Are you a mandated reporter? Find out. Years ago in schools it also used to be policy for a teacher to have to report to the principal first. Thank goodness that policy is no longer in effect- it wasn't even in effect in 2008.
Reporters are not investigators- that is the job of the police, DYFS or whatever the agency in your state is called. You may know it by CYS.. it is not called - CYA.
NJCAP continues to work in the schools. It is needed and is an international organization. I never asked for the "head of the coordinator", I asked for a change in policy. Reasonable heads prevailed. And I could look my former co-workers in the eye with honesty. I received thank you notes and words of thanks from them too.
Are you an advocate for children? You don't need a classroom to teach.
Marian R. Carlino
November 10, 2018
Sunday, October 7, 2018
If you only want to say something nice- at least read The Clery Act, the Bill of Rights and Jesus' indignation
Sexual assault is in the news. The #MeToo a movement of alleged survivors made up of both women and men who were alleged victims of sexual harassment, sexual molestation, and rape are upset because of the confirmation of Justice Brett Kavanaugh. The media took on a story line and then flew with it even when the alleged victim, Mrs. Ford, stated she had a fear of flying. The media against Kavanaugh or even the media supporting him did not use the word, "alleged" that I recall. Kavanaugh, if you haven't heard by now because you live under a rock or have your head in the sand, was accused with no corroborating evidence of sexual assault (not rape) as a student in high school (and then some less then stellar accusations as a student at college). The lawyerof the alleged victim is truly suspect in that accusation.
Sexual assault is a serious charge. It can include rape. The media against Kavanaugh implied that Kavanaugh was guilty of rape. They made several wrong moves in their rush to judgement. Even Mrs Ford did not accuse Kavanaugh of rape.
Accusations, false or true, need to be substantiated. The accused has rights as well as the alleged victim. Many in the media, favoring one political party over another, conveniently forgot that. Get a copy of the Bill of Rights.
In the end, Kavanaugh was confirmed as a Supreme Court Justice. But the damage is done. He will always be known as "that guy." He may fair better than his alleged victim. She needed better lawyers or a better acting coach, depending how you felt about her testimony. The leaders of the #MeToo movement have lost their own credibility by their actions.
I read both sides of the issues. Due to some background knowledge of child assault prevention, false accusations,and due process, before the alleged victim even testified under oath, Mrs. Ford's story seemed full of holes. For starters, if something impacted her life in so many ways, why didn't she speak out sooner? Every school in the country, due to the child assault cases of the Catholic Church, Penn State, and the Clery Act (1990) would say - REPORT!! She had plenty of opportunity- especially before he went to law school or took the bar. Do you know what lawyers have to disclose before they take the bar? Ask any lawyer.
Per the Catholic Church scandal, grand juries do believe alleged victims who step forward with corroborating evidence- even years later. Those stories have not been buried- well at least now in some dioceses.
Mrs. Ford works at a university. By law, she is to be knowledgeable of the Clery Act. Would she help an alleged victim or the accused? The victim, whose name is associated with The Clery Act was raped and murdered in 1986. Her parents became pro-active. As an educator, Mrs. Ford had an obligation to educate herself on that law.
Kavanaugh, guilty of being a teenager and young college student, is still being challenged. His demeanor was scrutinized when answering questions. Jesus was indignant and angry too. They hanged him. The Democrats tried to hang Kavanaugh.
They threaten to do it still.
If you can't say something nice, or don't want to get off the fence in this serious issue, read The Constitution again or for the first time. Read the Bill of Rights. We at least need a passing knowledge of it. Study what mandated reporters must do. Read The Clery Act.
Also read the consequences of false accusations, and mandatory reporting laws. Adults can not have third parties report. An alleged victim must step up. The consequences of not seeking justice against the alleged assaulter are actually worse for the alleged victim. There is healing in seeking the truth. But lies, will only make life worse.
Years ago at a high school where I used to live, a teen aged girl was raped. She was a top notch student, beautiful and popular. She went to the nurse after it happened but never told the nurse nor her mother. I knew the teenager's mother quite well. She told me years later what had happened. The girl was raped by a building contractor at the high school where my children attended- about a year or two later. The girl's grades dropped, she became a stay at home student. She ended up getting a GED. She didn't tell her mom for 6 months. Behaviors change after a rape. The victims need to report timely. And if a child's behavior changes drastically, then ASK. People get it wrong. I know. I remember the child in my second grade class. Her brother reported the rape that her father was committing against her. Her first grade teacher and the school nurse misread the signs.
It will be 21 years ago tomorrow, Oct. 8, that the principal came to my door and so ineptly said, "X" has to come with me." I let my students stand. She couldn't sit. Rape hurts a vagina.
I don't take kindly to sexual assault or false accusations. This whole situation makes me angry but I am not going to blame every male or white female on the planet, I will try to educate. That is what teachers do.
If you only want to say something nice.. you are part of the problem.
Throwing someone under the bus--has consequences. ASK. TELL TIMELY. DON'T FALSELY ACCUSE NOR PROJECT THE PAST ONTO THIS GENERATION. This generation is already suffering from the Fear of Flying- "zipless f****" circa 1973.. which coincidentally is the same year women got the right to kill a child in the womb. And we think this Supreme Court is tainted now?
Marian R. Carlino
October 7, 2018
Sexual assault is a serious charge. It can include rape. The media against Kavanaugh implied that Kavanaugh was guilty of rape. They made several wrong moves in their rush to judgement. Even Mrs Ford did not accuse Kavanaugh of rape.
Accusations, false or true, need to be substantiated. The accused has rights as well as the alleged victim. Many in the media, favoring one political party over another, conveniently forgot that. Get a copy of the Bill of Rights.
In the end, Kavanaugh was confirmed as a Supreme Court Justice. But the damage is done. He will always be known as "that guy." He may fair better than his alleged victim. She needed better lawyers or a better acting coach, depending how you felt about her testimony. The leaders of the #MeToo movement have lost their own credibility by their actions.
I read both sides of the issues. Due to some background knowledge of child assault prevention, false accusations,and due process, before the alleged victim even testified under oath, Mrs. Ford's story seemed full of holes. For starters, if something impacted her life in so many ways, why didn't she speak out sooner? Every school in the country, due to the child assault cases of the Catholic Church, Penn State, and the Clery Act (1990) would say - REPORT!! She had plenty of opportunity- especially before he went to law school or took the bar. Do you know what lawyers have to disclose before they take the bar? Ask any lawyer.
Per the Catholic Church scandal, grand juries do believe alleged victims who step forward with corroborating evidence- even years later. Those stories have not been buried- well at least now in some dioceses.
Mrs. Ford works at a university. By law, she is to be knowledgeable of the Clery Act. Would she help an alleged victim or the accused? The victim, whose name is associated with The Clery Act was raped and murdered in 1986. Her parents became pro-active. As an educator, Mrs. Ford had an obligation to educate herself on that law.
Kavanaugh, guilty of being a teenager and young college student, is still being challenged. His demeanor was scrutinized when answering questions. Jesus was indignant and angry too. They hanged him. The Democrats tried to hang Kavanaugh.
They threaten to do it still.
If you can't say something nice, or don't want to get off the fence in this serious issue, read The Constitution again or for the first time. Read the Bill of Rights. We at least need a passing knowledge of it. Study what mandated reporters must do. Read The Clery Act.
Also read the consequences of false accusations, and mandatory reporting laws. Adults can not have third parties report. An alleged victim must step up. The consequences of not seeking justice against the alleged assaulter are actually worse for the alleged victim. There is healing in seeking the truth. But lies, will only make life worse.
Years ago at a high school where I used to live, a teen aged girl was raped. She was a top notch student, beautiful and popular. She went to the nurse after it happened but never told the nurse nor her mother. I knew the teenager's mother quite well. She told me years later what had happened. The girl was raped by a building contractor at the high school where my children attended- about a year or two later. The girl's grades dropped, she became a stay at home student. She ended up getting a GED. She didn't tell her mom for 6 months. Behaviors change after a rape. The victims need to report timely. And if a child's behavior changes drastically, then ASK. People get it wrong. I know. I remember the child in my second grade class. Her brother reported the rape that her father was committing against her. Her first grade teacher and the school nurse misread the signs.
It will be 21 years ago tomorrow, Oct. 8, that the principal came to my door and so ineptly said, "X" has to come with me." I let my students stand. She couldn't sit. Rape hurts a vagina.
I don't take kindly to sexual assault or false accusations. This whole situation makes me angry but I am not going to blame every male or white female on the planet, I will try to educate. That is what teachers do.
If you only want to say something nice.. you are part of the problem.
Throwing someone under the bus--has consequences. ASK. TELL TIMELY. DON'T FALSELY ACCUSE NOR PROJECT THE PAST ONTO THIS GENERATION. This generation is already suffering from the Fear of Flying- "zipless f****" circa 1973.. which coincidentally is the same year women got the right to kill a child in the womb. And we think this Supreme Court is tainted now?
Marian R. Carlino
October 7, 2018
Saturday, September 15, 2018
Stained Glass Windows
Stained glass windows are dark, unless light is shining through. In the daylight, the colors don't appear lively. At night, with no light, one would not be able to discern the individual pieces except for the lead in between.
Stained glass- when the light shines through are beautiful. Let the light shine. They become "alive."
History of stained glass
Let the light shine through and make the stains of sin not over shadow the stained glass windows of the Word. The Catholic Church is not alone in the history of sexual abuse nor cover ups. That being said, the abusive staff and clergy used their positions to violate God's law. Know God's law and the practical application of those laws on reporting. Start with knowing the signs. Abuser use similar techniques no matter the location of their preying ground. All of their behaviors are criminal.
If you are a victim of past abuse, seek help.
Google the report. It is in a pdf form and can be downloaded. Don't blame the messengers and do not blame all clergy. Just as the universities, the Olympics, Hollywood and families have tried not to bring scandal, they have found the cover ups do just that. God sees the bigger picture even before the artist assembles the pieces in a window or a report.
Eventually God allows the light to shine through the cover ups. The adults in charge in this Grand Jury report ignored the messengers. None of us are free from the stain of sin because sin has ripple effects. Those signed confidentiality agreements are stained with blood.
To be truly beautiful, Keep the light on.
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| The light was shining through during the Eucharist consecration. Jesus' face and halo were shining. |
Jesus is the light of the world. He came to us because of the stain of sin. Hold our clergy accountable. They are not infallible. We have Peter and Judas in our history. Stained glass windows do tell that story.
.
I am a cradle Catholic who was often a lazy Catholic in my early adult years. I am no longer lazy. I currently live in a "ground zero" city for the scandal. .. and I heard the cry of a friend. So I am asking the faithful to read the report. Find relevance in your background checks and training. If you do not, you are part of the problem and you should get out of any ministry with which you are currently working. I have told teachers the same thing about working in a school.
If you can't say something nice about someone, then that may mean the person is not kind.
If you think you are not worthy to speak up, speak up, we are all broken. God uses the broken for the greater good. The devil does not.
Article about how the Church tried to block grand jury report
When I have prayed for the truth to be revealed in my own life, God reveals it. Sometimes I even get phone calls.
Marian R. Carlino
September 15, 2018
The Red Plastic Straw and Eating My Way Through Lawrenceville
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| Chocalate Paradise and the red straw |
For the past several weeks, I have been house sitting in Lawrenceville, Pa. A few weeks ago I wrote a few ideas about my stay here. Lawrenceville is an eclectic section of Pittsburgh. It was once very depressed in terms of the economy, but, it too has thought outside the proverbial box and has welcomed new types of businesses. Lawrenceville has the Children's Hospital, tech companies, contractors who are renovating run down properties and building new. It is true that property values have gone up so the cost of living has as well, but what would one rather have? New eating establishments open, close, stay for a long time, and welcome people from all around. A movie theater and a bowling alley... right here. Last week the movie theater ran The Wizard of Oz. The bowling alley has a live DJ.
I met people from Delaware in front of Geppeto Cafe today as they were waiting and I didn't want to cut in front. They told me they were waiting for take out. After I ordered mine, we chatted. They were visiting Pittsburgh for a birthday party. I told them of other areas too if doing a bit of sight seeing- downtown, the sports complexes, museums, the Cathedral of Learning on Pitts campus in Oakland, and the Strip District. Streets are closed downtown for the filming of Mr. Rogers with Tom Hanks as Mr. Rogers. These are all places I love in the Paris of Appalachia and the home of Mr. Rogers. Thanks to Beth and Cousin Gerry for all those tours years ago.
I stopped at Frio, the Penn State Creamery, ice cream shop again today. It won't be on my regular route home to my apartment, so I took advantage. Once I make room after having had a few sips of a truly rich Chocolate Paradise milkshake from Frio, I can see if the food from Gepetto Cafe is as good as the crowd waiting outside and full tables inside would indicate. I stopped and got a coffee there this morning - that was great!! Children would love the decor of puppets.
So why am I writing about food-- well I have been eating my way through Lawrenceville on this vacation time. So many people in years past used the expression "Love the one you're with." Well, that advice got a lot of people in trouble. So, I say, "Love the place you live." This is not to take anything away from my NJ roots. They go deep-- 59 years deep. But Pittsburgh is a place I always loved once I visited Aunt Ann Rosinski. Then Beth moved here with Keith so the visits were more often. Our few years in Indiana, Pa. made it a favorite city- stamped in my heart. My daughter went to Pitt- visdom, visdom, visdom!! ( My inner circle would get the spelling.)
The proprietor of Frio doesn't need a law to tell him that plastic straws can be an issue. His straws are large because without the large one, that is not paper, the chunks of brownies (or strawberries) would not travel to the direction of the mouth!!
So I am posting these pictures for those who would love to visit Paris but can't. There is a delicious French bakery too!! Come to Pittsburgh, Paris of Appalachia, says an author. Native Pittsburgher's and those from other countries who have chosen to invest in it are always welcoming. The accents of those I meet often are not Pittsburgh accents. I have brought my NJ accent with me too!! But the Pittsburgh accent- today in front of the restaurant a young woman was speaking. I looked to see if it was my friend with whom I stood this morning in my advocacy.
No law needed for Frio to think of the environment!! I kept my pink straw to re-use.
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| This customer got a waffle cone. The proprietor is from Turkey. And the sign, well, that tells me he doesn't need a new law. |
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| A sign on the fence of a property in the local neighborhood. I asked the owner if I could take a picture. He said yes. Marian R. Carlino September 15, 2018 |
Sunday, August 26, 2018
The Actor- an Education (for whom) and 3%
It was a beautiful Saturday morning. And as I often do, I witness in front of PP. PP is an ugly, dirty building at the intersection of Liberty Avenue and Smithfield Street in downtown Pittsburgh. PP locates in urban areas- on purpose. They want bus routes near by their establishments or easy access.
As my fellow advocates and I were standing there, a older man got out of a car. He yelled at my friend that we should be protesting up in Oakland (at a park I read later) against the war. My mind flashed back to Vietnam. I was wondering which war was under protest. I googled the information later and found out it was a protest against the defense budget. This bit of knowledge made the comments I suggested even more prophetic.
I asked the man, as he tried to open the theater door a few feet from where I was standing, if he wanted a resource card. He went off on me too.. telling me if I were really pro-life, I would be at the protest. I told him I am pro-life and have chosen the right to life as my advocacy. He told me I should be protesting the war and the death penalty and that woman have the right to do whatever they want with their bodies. (The law would not agree. Try injecting yourself with heroin. The law would have plenty to say and I bet he would too.)
Well- I am glad you mentioned the death penalty I told him as he still struggled to get into the door. It is a local theater. He is one of the actors. I know he is an actor because I asked him why he wasn't at the protest. He said he couldn't go because he had to work- he is an actor. Oh good, an actor who is working. He didn't know that I was going to my work after my time on the sidewalk. He didn't care. He didn't ask what I do for work nor why I stand and take time to advocate for non-violent choices to abortion.
I was glad he mentioned the death penalty. I was able to tell him I did help change the law in NJ. I got off a proverbial fence that so many sit on and wrote my representatives. I told them how I was found "guilty" of "incompetence" as a teacher. I told them how I should have had all the rights afforded me but my rights were violated. I told them how easy it was for people to lie and the evidence ignored. I told them I was a white woman in my 40's at the time and had the so called backing of a union. I told them I think everyone has a chance to change.. even if it means life in prison, as I am for justice. I told them my story. My representatives thanked me. ....An injustice for one so to speak.
I didn't say all that to the man..just the part of the advocating for change but I did tell him the law was changed, but not long after that my friend's son ended up on death row (Pennsylvania). He was found guilty by a judge of the deaths of three women and a child. Abortion factored into the whole scenario for that man. He paid for one of the dead women to have an abortion not long before he murdered the woman, her sister and the little girl. (The third adult victim had been from years before.) On a side note, there was no fair trial by a jury of his peers for the man.
Not knowing at the time of our brief encounter that the protest was on the defense budget, I asked him if he was against war, how did he feel about 3% of PP financial success being from abortion. He didn't answer. I asked again. The door still did not open and neither did he respond. Babies die in abortion. If it was the woman's body that would definitely die, she may make a more non-violent choice. Women do regret their choices for their bodies after the abortion. And they mourn the death of the child.
Then since he was concerned that others should protest against the war, I pointed out that during the Vietnam War, Dow Chemical (called baby killers back then) manufactured napalm. It was only 1% of their business but they were called baby killers. The actor could not do the math it seems. But I did know someone years ago who did. I met him as my neighbor in O.C., NJ. He was a biology teacher at Holy Spirit High School. He had worked for Dow Chemical when he first got out of college, but he quit, he told me, because of the napalm.
If you have a problem with deaths caused by war, how can you possibly accept the death of an unborn child with the lame and false reasoning that women have a right to do whatever they want to choose with their bodies. Try drinking out of a plastic straw (thrown in for good measure this morning) in some cities. Try getting an opioid today without a check of a state database. Try hugging a student in a classroom- male or female.
The righteous anti-war protester who wasn't going to the protest because he had to work - didn't answer any of my questions. He wouldn't even answer the name of the play in which he was performing. The door finally opened when another actor, who smiled at us, came along. He must have had the magic to open the door.
I include the definition of hypocrisy here: from Google: the practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one's own behavior does not conform; pretense.
We can all be hypocritical, it is true. But regarding the turtle,
"Behold the turtle, he makes progress only when he sticks his neck out." When you are willing to stick your neck out to educate others, make sure the closets are open and cleaned out.
As my fellow advocates and I were standing there, a older man got out of a car. He yelled at my friend that we should be protesting up in Oakland (at a park I read later) against the war. My mind flashed back to Vietnam. I was wondering which war was under protest. I googled the information later and found out it was a protest against the defense budget. This bit of knowledge made the comments I suggested even more prophetic.
I asked the man, as he tried to open the theater door a few feet from where I was standing, if he wanted a resource card. He went off on me too.. telling me if I were really pro-life, I would be at the protest. I told him I am pro-life and have chosen the right to life as my advocacy. He told me I should be protesting the war and the death penalty and that woman have the right to do whatever they want with their bodies. (The law would not agree. Try injecting yourself with heroin. The law would have plenty to say and I bet he would too.)
Well- I am glad you mentioned the death penalty I told him as he still struggled to get into the door. It is a local theater. He is one of the actors. I know he is an actor because I asked him why he wasn't at the protest. He said he couldn't go because he had to work- he is an actor. Oh good, an actor who is working. He didn't know that I was going to my work after my time on the sidewalk. He didn't care. He didn't ask what I do for work nor why I stand and take time to advocate for non-violent choices to abortion.
I was glad he mentioned the death penalty. I was able to tell him I did help change the law in NJ. I got off a proverbial fence that so many sit on and wrote my representatives. I told them how I was found "guilty" of "incompetence" as a teacher. I told them how I should have had all the rights afforded me but my rights were violated. I told them how easy it was for people to lie and the evidence ignored. I told them I was a white woman in my 40's at the time and had the so called backing of a union. I told them I think everyone has a chance to change.. even if it means life in prison, as I am for justice. I told them my story. My representatives thanked me. ....An injustice for one so to speak.
I didn't say all that to the man..just the part of the advocating for change but I did tell him the law was changed, but not long after that my friend's son ended up on death row (Pennsylvania). He was found guilty by a judge of the deaths of three women and a child. Abortion factored into the whole scenario for that man. He paid for one of the dead women to have an abortion not long before he murdered the woman, her sister and the little girl. (The third adult victim had been from years before.) On a side note, there was no fair trial by a jury of his peers for the man.
Not knowing at the time of our brief encounter that the protest was on the defense budget, I asked him if he was against war, how did he feel about 3% of PP financial success being from abortion. He didn't answer. I asked again. The door still did not open and neither did he respond. Babies die in abortion. If it was the woman's body that would definitely die, she may make a more non-violent choice. Women do regret their choices for their bodies after the abortion. And they mourn the death of the child.
Then since he was concerned that others should protest against the war, I pointed out that during the Vietnam War, Dow Chemical (called baby killers back then) manufactured napalm. It was only 1% of their business but they were called baby killers. The actor could not do the math it seems. But I did know someone years ago who did. I met him as my neighbor in O.C., NJ. He was a biology teacher at Holy Spirit High School. He had worked for Dow Chemical when he first got out of college, but he quit, he told me, because of the napalm.
If you have a problem with deaths caused by war, how can you possibly accept the death of an unborn child with the lame and false reasoning that women have a right to do whatever they want to choose with their bodies. Try drinking out of a plastic straw (thrown in for good measure this morning) in some cities. Try getting an opioid today without a check of a state database. Try hugging a student in a classroom- male or female.
The righteous anti-war protester who wasn't going to the protest because he had to work - didn't answer any of my questions. He wouldn't even answer the name of the play in which he was performing. The door finally opened when another actor, who smiled at us, came along. He must have had the magic to open the door.
I include the definition of hypocrisy here: from Google: the practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one's own behavior does not conform; pretense.
We can all be hypocritical, it is true. But regarding the turtle,
"Behold the turtle, he makes progress only when he sticks his neck out." When you are willing to stick your neck out to educate others, make sure the closets are open and cleaned out.
Aborted babies are stuck between the hypocrisy of political correctness.
If only it were the woman's body, but a baby's body has different DNA and blood supply. A male child is carried in utero. A woman does not have a penis unless it is made of plastic or some other fake material.
All the world's a stage.. some are actors.
Marian R. Carlino
August 26, 2018
All the world's a stage.. some are actors.
Marian R. Carlino
August 26, 2018
Janet and Nellie- an Education Part 2
I decided to walk along side streets as part of my walk home from the bus stop yesterday. I had to stay on the main street for my walking and eating tour for the night. After I bought the main course at a Burgher's place- play on words is their idea, I carried my first bag of goodies and took the side street. This area of Pittsburgh is eclectic, trendy now, and full of history. I remember the general area from years ago. Ross' cousin, a member of a religious order, lived for a time in this section. We would visit her when we were just married and living in Indiana, Pa. Lawrenceville has many old churches, most closed now.
But people have re-invested in Lawrenceville and for several years now, it has had a rebirth. People investing in their neighborhoods or strangers coming in and investing in the neighborhood is good. Pittsburghers know how to do that.
As I was making my way back up to the main street, as the river walk will be for another time, I journeyed through a new apartment complex. I have seen the progress of it because from my seat on the bus, I have watched. For the last few summers I have vacationed in this part of Pittsburgh- which I mean sincerely.
I met Janet and her dog Nellie. We came close enough in contact to exchange greetings. Then I said I liked the stone fence and took a picture of it. She took a seat near where I was standing and started talking. I learned several things about the section of Pittsburgh in the 10 minute conversation. The section is called Arsenal and with good reason. She told me when they were building the complex in which we were standing, they found canon balls in the ground. Pittsburgh is surrounded by rivers. It would make sense that during the wars it be would be a site for all sorts of manufacturing.
A high school is across the street. The first floor of the building in front of which we were standing remains empty. A brewery type establishment was to be licensed to operate in it. But, the neighbors got together to fight it because the high school was across the street. For a variety of reasons, the idea was not a good one. I hope something opens in the space for all to enjoy.
Some of the old industrial buildings are being re-purposed. Janet said around the corner from where we were standing is a high tech business. Janet pointed to where Uber has a presence in Lawrenceville. - in the Arsenal section. Small eating establishments, small stores like antique shops (met the owner of one tonight- we talked!) and dress shops make up a huge part of the area. There is new construction for the Fransicans' order. Several tatoo parlors will paint your arms and what ever else. Bowling has not gone out of style here. Carnegie Mellon University, which has its main campus in Oakland, also has a part to play in the revitalization of the area.
Janet was born and raised in Lawrenceville. I told her I love the section of Pittsburgh and enjoy coming every summer to live. As we discussed different topics related to the neighborhood, Nellie sat and listened. I bet she would have a thing or two to say too if she could speak.
I told Janet that I always wanted to see Paris. In a local book store here in Lawrenceville, I found a book titled, Pittsburgh, Paris of Appalachia. I live in Paris. So does she!
My first summer in Pittsburgh, my daughter and I watched the fireworks at Arsenal Park- food was involved!!
Janet, with Nellie, and I with my bag of treats for the main dinner course, went in separate directions as our conversation ended. My life is a little richer after having met Janet and Nellie.
Marian R. Carlino
August 26, 2018
But people have re-invested in Lawrenceville and for several years now, it has had a rebirth. People investing in their neighborhoods or strangers coming in and investing in the neighborhood is good. Pittsburghers know how to do that.
As I was making my way back up to the main street, as the river walk will be for another time, I journeyed through a new apartment complex. I have seen the progress of it because from my seat on the bus, I have watched. For the last few summers I have vacationed in this part of Pittsburgh- which I mean sincerely.
I met Janet and her dog Nellie. We came close enough in contact to exchange greetings. Then I said I liked the stone fence and took a picture of it. She took a seat near where I was standing and started talking. I learned several things about the section of Pittsburgh in the 10 minute conversation. The section is called Arsenal and with good reason. She told me when they were building the complex in which we were standing, they found canon balls in the ground. Pittsburgh is surrounded by rivers. It would make sense that during the wars it be would be a site for all sorts of manufacturing.
A high school is across the street. The first floor of the building in front of which we were standing remains empty. A brewery type establishment was to be licensed to operate in it. But, the neighbors got together to fight it because the high school was across the street. For a variety of reasons, the idea was not a good one. I hope something opens in the space for all to enjoy.
Some of the old industrial buildings are being re-purposed. Janet said around the corner from where we were standing is a high tech business. Janet pointed to where Uber has a presence in Lawrenceville. - in the Arsenal section. Small eating establishments, small stores like antique shops (met the owner of one tonight- we talked!) and dress shops make up a huge part of the area. There is new construction for the Fransicans' order. Several tatoo parlors will paint your arms and what ever else. Bowling has not gone out of style here. Carnegie Mellon University, which has its main campus in Oakland, also has a part to play in the revitalization of the area.
Janet was born and raised in Lawrenceville. I told her I love the section of Pittsburgh and enjoy coming every summer to live. As we discussed different topics related to the neighborhood, Nellie sat and listened. I bet she would have a thing or two to say too if she could speak.
I told Janet that I always wanted to see Paris. In a local book store here in Lawrenceville, I found a book titled, Pittsburgh, Paris of Appalachia. I live in Paris. So does she!
My first summer in Pittsburgh, my daughter and I watched the fireworks at Arsenal Park- food was involved!!
Janet, with Nellie, and I with my bag of treats for the main dinner course, went in separate directions as our conversation ended. My life is a little richer after having met Janet and Nellie.
Marian R. Carlino
August 26, 2018
The Pink Straw and an Education
I had a most delicious milkshake from a new place of business last night. The sweet smell of waffle cones being made drew me in. I conversed with the owner of the new establishment while the specialty shake was being made. I learned a little about him and he learned a little about me. Our conversation was friendly, open and honest while remaining pedestrian. Our accents determined that neither one of us were native of Pittsburgh. I am a Jersey girl and he is from Turkey. I asked how long the store had been open. He said eight days. So theoretically, I was one of his first customers. Two younger people made the shake. I went with the strawberry cheesecake this time!
The sign outside advertised "we have Penn State ice cream". I joked that they needed a sign for Pitt ice cream also. The owner educated me. He said there is a creamery in the Penn State area that makes the ice cream. It is quite famous. I did not know that. I later googled the information. Very true. Penn State alumni would know that.
We joked about the rivalry and the selling aspect of sweet smells as one passes by.
We connected over a sweet smell. I drank my milkshake out of a wide pink straw while I walked along the main street. The large pieces of strawberries could be sucked right up out of the creamy cheesecake shake. When I got home I used that straw as a spoon to get every last drop of cream and topping that would not make its way through the straw.
The large, pink, plastic straw- a happy color choice for a business to use. Paper would not have worked.
Thanks FRIO creamery!!
I will have to walk a little longer today, but my life is a little richer today because of that sweet smell and a conversation.
Marian R. Carlino
August 26, 2018
Saturday, August 11, 2018
They called it Amish Grace-and a 13 year old girl named Marian
The day it happened, one of my close friends texted me, that she wanted to take the kids and get away from the ugliness of this world. I hadn't seen the news so I didn't know the reference at that point. How does one explain a massacre at a quiet school setting in the Amish countryside? If one has never been to the Lancaster County area of Pennsylvania, one would not know that two cultures exist- side by side. Hustling and bustling, yet overall peaceful.
When my children were young, my family visited the area and I have driven through it many times. I often wondered how the Amish could live side by side with the tourist areas. Of course, part of that tourist money is their livelihood. I like city sidewalks and the hustle and bustle of city life, but there was an appealing aspect of the quieter side. Living simply and with family. Possible but not tried by many these days.
So in 2006, when the international news broke that a quiet setting in Lancaster, Pa was torn apart, the news was shocking. The linked article gives some explanation as to why the homicidal/suicidal man took the lives of young children, then his own. It is an interesting read.
The name Marian comes up in the article.
" When the state police arrived, Roberts ordered them to leave the property or he would shoot. He told the girls, “I’m going to make you pay for my daughter.” One of the girls, 13-year old Marian, said, “Shoot me first.” Roberts began shooting each of the girls before finally shooting himself. When the police broke in to the school, two of the girls, including Marian, were dead. Naomi Rose died in the arms of a state trooper."
The teacher's response is interesting:
"When the young teacher saw his guns, she and her mother left the other adults with the children and ran to a nearby house for help. A call was made to 911."
When my children were young, my family visited the area and I have driven through it many times. I often wondered how the Amish could live side by side with the tourist areas. Of course, part of that tourist money is their livelihood. I like city sidewalks and the hustle and bustle of city life, but there was an appealing aspect of the quieter side. Living simply and with family. Possible but not tried by many these days.
So in 2006, when the international news broke that a quiet setting in Lancaster, Pa was torn apart, the news was shocking. The linked article gives some explanation as to why the homicidal/suicidal man took the lives of young children, then his own. It is an interesting read.
The name Marian comes up in the article.
" When the state police arrived, Roberts ordered them to leave the property or he would shoot. He told the girls, “I’m going to make you pay for my daughter.” One of the girls, 13-year old Marian, said, “Shoot me first.” Roberts began shooting each of the girls before finally shooting himself. When the police broke in to the school, two of the girls, including Marian, were dead. Naomi Rose died in the arms of a state trooper."
The teacher's response is interesting:
"When the young teacher saw his guns, she and her mother left the other adults with the children and ran to a nearby house for help. A call was made to 911."
The Amish community of Nickel Mines has been given much credit with offering forgiveness. They offered forgiveness to the man's family. But being human, they can not escape the stages of grief. The Amish also are a community who shun people in their own faith practice, so in this circumstance, the murderer was not one of their own community of believers. The murderer was a vengeful man who hated God. He would be in jail today if he had not committed suicide.
At Nickle Mines, the message that day per the article:
"On the blackboard was a sign with a teddy bear. The sign read “Visitors Bubble Up Our Days”. One revenge minded visitor destroyed it.
I don't agree with the white washing of history, so I have always argued the point that the school districts which have experienced the school massacres or have had any type of violence occur, then try to explain it away, are part of the problem and not part of the solution. Columbine and Parkland, Florida (the name of the high school at Parkland is conveniently not the household name that Columbine is) have been the best examples. The schools experienced the same type of tragedy-20 years apart- of having huge problems explode on the national scene. The Columbine killers real dream was to have the school explode.
"On the blackboard was a sign with a teddy bear. The sign read “Visitors Bubble Up Our Days”. One revenge minded visitor destroyed it.
I don't agree with the white washing of history, so I have always argued the point that the school districts which have experienced the school massacres or have had any type of violence occur, then try to explain it away, are part of the problem and not part of the solution. Columbine and Parkland, Florida (the name of the high school at Parkland is conveniently not the household name that Columbine is) have been the best examples. The schools experienced the same type of tragedy-20 years apart- of having huge problems explode on the national scene. The Columbine killers real dream was to have the school explode.
None of the families have sought vengeance. The families want answers, but they have offered forgiveness as well. Seeking the truth is not about vengeance. I do feel that grace has been shown in many, if not all, of the families which have experienced the tragedies. If grace is what we need after a tragedy, let's try to put grace into effect, in order to prevent one. Those who march after a death and block sidewalks and roadways could learn a thing or two as well from the grace of the Amish.
On a scale of justice, violence begets violence.. and no justice will prevail.
Amish School shooting YouTube video The mother of the 32 year old killer speaks
The wife of the Nickle Mines killer The mother took a fetal position.....
Amish School shooting YouTube video The mother of the 32 year old killer speaks
The wife of the Nickle Mines killer The mother took a fetal position.....
Why should you care? Another school year has started.
Marian R. Carlino
August 11, 2018
Friday, July 6, 2018
Not Sure What to Call This!
When Dorothy landed in Munchkin Land, a colorful bunch of short people, who talked funny, met her. It was all for effect. They had just been harassed by a lady in black who wore red and white socks and red shiny shoes (at least in the movie version) whose main form of transportation was a broom. Dorothy was in shock from the long nightmarish flight and the Munchkins, too, were surprised. She wasn’t sure what they were talking about until some pointed to the red and white striped legs showing out from under the house.
So, they asked, “Are you a good witch or a bad witch?” Her response, was “Well, I am not a witch at all.” They snickered. They meant no harm. They happened to have a good witch and a bad witch in their town. All were happy. Dorothy appeared to have performed magic or a miracle. Dorothy did not call it a miracle but they thought she had powers to rid them of the wicked witch.
In the real world, if someone is called a witch, it is not meant as a compliment unless you are one. There are religious practices that have witches and warlocks.
Witch with a b: Now, there is another word that they didn’t call Dorothy, that word rhymes with witch. It starts with a “b”. If you have read other entries in my blog you may be aware that being called that by a parent of an angry child put my radar up. I had been called a “b” many times. I have even used the word a few times or so. But this time it was different. A father, with an angry, troubled child, was fueling the fire against not only me, but against the other teachers who were responsible for working with him. Taken in context, the word was a warning. People like to hurt “b”-sometimes more than one at a time.. An angry, violent child does not need a parent calling his or her teachers’ names when they are trying to help.
“Quirky”- they didn’t use that word as far as I know in the Wizard of Oz, but I have been called it- twice in significant situations. My work wasn’t “quirky”, I was called “quirky” by a principal and a Catholic priest. According to Bing, quirky means:
[ˈkwərkē]
ADJECTIVE
characterized by peculiar or unexpected traits.
"her sense of humor was decidedly quirky"
synonyms: eccentric · idiosyncratic · unconventional · unorthodox · unusual · off-center · strange · bizarre · weird · peculiar · odd · freakish · outlandish · offbeat · out of the ordinary · Bohemian · [more]
Take your pick. I don’t think it was meant as a compliment. The use was in two conversations about two different children in two different learning situations about 14 years apart from each other. Funny, the priest had been a principal at one time and the principal later became principal at the school church (after her retirement as a superintendent). Would you call that situation, “quirky”?
Incompetent- No, not in the movie. Scarecrow thought he was incompetent but he showed the witch and all the others who thought he didn’t have a brain. Yes, I was labeled, in writing in reference to my decision to protect my class, as incompetent. Unemployment later called my testimony “competent”. Incompetent usually means -one does not have the slightest capability to do something. in·com·pe·tent
[inˈkämpədənt]
ADJECTIVE
not having or showing the necessary skills to do something successfully.
"a forgetful and utterly incompetent assistant"
synonyms: inept · unskillful · unskilled · inexpert · amateurish · unprofessional · [more]
NOUN
an incompetent person.
synonyms: bungler · blunderer · incompetent · oaf · dunce · dolt · dunderhead · [more]
Twit- nope, I have never been called that but add a letter and yes, #metoocalledafemalebodypart
So, while standing in front of PP last December, a robust looking red- haired man who didn’t like our presence, criticized me for standing there. He wasn’t driving but it was a near miss when the car in which he was riding pulled up to the curb. He told me I was not allowed to stand in the road as I was crossing to the other side of the buffer zone. I asked him if he knew of the constraints of the buffer zone and Constitutional rights. He went low, I went high. He called me a “twit with the extra letter”. I called security as he walked into the building next to PP. When we are called names while standing in front of PP, it is sometimes the people who work in part of that building or who work for tbe Trust. They wear their identification lanyards. It doesn’t matter to them that babies are aborted next door to their theater. (Well, it doesn’t seem to bother those on the first floor.) The President of the Cultural Trust was notified. Name calling, I believe, is less of a problem from them now. And people who are pro-life may “tweet” but none are “twits or tw—ts”.
The dictionary does not list it except in the “urban” dictionary. I am not sure the word existed when Dorothy first came into her creator's mind.
Debbie Downer- Google says: “Debbie Downer is a name of a fictional Saturday Night Live character who debuted in 2004, and who was portrayed by Rachel Dratch . The character's name, Debbie Downer , is a slang phrase which refers to someone who frequently adds bad news and negative feelings to a gathering, thus bringing down the mood of everyone around them.”
When one brings up in a conversation (already slanted to the topics of school violence or abortion) one may often get called “Debbie Downer”. I have actually been told to stop talking. So, I did. Jesus walked away too. Dorothy was kind of a downer too. After all, she was battling a bad witch.
SNL, a show which knows how to insult the best in the world. The writers evidently never watched The Wizard of Oz.
Kids just want to have fun- but when they die in school shootings or in abortions, they never get a chance to stay up late enough to watch the character assassinations.
Trumper- Now this is the one that is so politically charged this year that it has caused people to be escorted out of restaurants, have drinks thrown in their faces, and caused a racial divide, political divide and divided families. If anyone truly knows me, I am truly not a huge fan. But I am a realist and a pro-lifer. A vote for the other candidate would have been against not only my religious beliefs but my conscience. There are a whole lot of us out there much to the chagrin of the other candidate who was often called the "b" word.
Again, this word is not in the dictionary but it is listed in the urban dictionary. In context as it is stated in front of PP, it is an insult. In context as it is stated on FB, it is meant as an insult. Trump is pro-life. But he may also be quirky! He, however, as some would think, is not incompetent.
Christian- stated with an insulting tone. People can get away with calling someone a “Christian” with a negative tone but don’t call a person of another faith with the same tone nor people of other preferences. It can land one in court. What does one actually have against a man who performed miracles? Are they jealous because the best they can do is cast spells?
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but when I am called a name meant to insult, I know I am on the path that leads all to freedom. Some do not understand the high road because it is less traveled- especially these days.
Whatever the mob or crowd says you are, never forget you are a child of God.
Love,
Marian - aka Some call me “the good witch”. But what is good?
July 6, 2018
Love,
Marian - aka Some call me “the good witch”. But what is good?
July 6, 2018
Thursday, July 5, 2018
BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ASK FOR- WHERE WAS THE OUTRAGE?
In 2008, I wrote the following editorial. I have made no "notations" so I am not sure if it was published but at the time, 10 years ago, the Safe Haven law became problematic for Nebraska. If you do not know what the Safe Haven laws are, you will have to google the law in your state.
Nebraska's legal efforts to help protect the lives of infants and babies with safe haven laws are in the national spotlight because parents are choosing to bring children as old as teenagers to leave in state custody. This might seem like a new phenomenon, but in reality, the abandonment of parental responsibility is nothing new. Abandonment comes in many forms and is costing this nation and our culture of life. Parenting is not for the weak. Some adults may need assistance helping to deal with the stress involved with raising children. Other adults need to learn that parenting involves sacrifice. We are not a nation that values the most precious resource of all, our children. From conception, our children are at risk of legal abandonment.
Marian R. Carlino November 14, 2008
"But the story of how and why she did has taken on a freshly painful significance for her in the last two months. It is one that Byers, now the president of the board of the Nebraska Family Support Network, is hearing over and over again from other parents. In September, Nebraska enacted its now-infamous Safe Haven law, allowing parents to leave children up to age 18 at hospitals throughout the state without going through the more involved custody relinquishment process. Thirty-five kids, mostly preteens and teens—five of them from other states—were dropped off before the state legislature hastily convened to amend the law on Nov. 21. In some cases, these families' circumstances—their tragedies and unmet needs—were the same as those that had driven Byers to give up custody of her own daughter. Many of the teens were suffering from mental illness and behavioral problems; they had depleted their families' financial
Nebraska's legal efforts to help protect the lives of infants and babies with safe haven laws are in the national spotlight because parents are choosing to bring children as old as teenagers to leave in state custody. This might seem like a new phenomenon, but in reality, the abandonment of parental responsibility is nothing new. Abandonment comes in many forms and is costing this nation and our culture of life. Parenting is not for the weak. Some adults may need assistance helping to deal with the stress involved with raising children. Other adults need to learn that parenting involves sacrifice. We are not a nation that values the most precious resource of all, our children. From conception, our children are at risk of legal abandonment.
Marian R. Carlino November 14, 2008
The following is a link to an article written in 2008. The Aftermath
and emotional wells. Two of the families sought out Byers' help. "The crisis that these children and families were in was one where the parents had gotten to the point of saying, 'Oh my God, my child is going to end up in jail or worse, dead'," she says. "They felt they had no choice but to do this."
The Aftermath.. a day after the Nebraska's amended Safe Haven law—which went into effect Nov. 22, (2008) a day after the state's Republican Gov. David Heineman signed off—now applies only to babies under 30 days old. Many child advocates applaud the fix; they say parents of older children should never use safe-haven laws, lest they scar their children with the stigma of abandonment."
(2008)- "Child welfare is one of the least-funded programs in every state," says Father Steven Boes, the national executive director of Boys Town, which has campuses in 12 states. "
http://www.newsweek.com/aftermath-nebraskas-safe-haven-law-83271 (See link- under The Aftermath above.
Was there outrage?
This information is vital to dealing with child assault prevention- from the womb to the classroom to the street.
Marian R. Carlino
July 5, 2018
There's a man with a scissor over there- Part 2
Has there ever been a time in history when voices of reason are not shut down in deference to voices of unreason? Probably not. Has there ever been a time when mob mentality didn't incorrectly influence decisions of leadership? Probably not.
In Jesus' time, the mob yelled "Crucify him." and the cowardly leadership released Barabbas. They were afraid of the mob. They sacrificed The Truth for a lie.
Mob mentality or group think exists. We see it in the news, daily. It is difficult to sort fact from fiction, especially when the crowd thinks yelling will get their point across, when a mob rules.
One of the things I have found in the learning curve of child assault prevention work, starting with protecting children in the womb, is that mob mentality exists. And when the opposition to child assault in the womb (those who are pro-life) act in the same way as those who support assault on the child in the womb (pro-abortion) the latter group (willing to sacrifice children in the womb), get nastier. The pro-abortion groups march, stage sit-ins, yell, rant and rave. The mob considers them heroic in our confused culture. Let a pro-life group march, stage a sit in, yell, rant or rave and they are considered nuts. ( Please note- after having grown up in the 1960's- with mob violence the rage, I am not a fan of marches, mob rule, sit ins, or protests which block public access. Nor do I allow those types of leadership influence my decisions. We still have war and people of all races still discriminate against each other. Even decades of the March for Life has not changed Roe v Wade. The fashionable Million Mom March, well, the Columbine effect seems to have been more effective.)
The voices of those who have left the pro-abortion culture of death point to the presence of peaceful, prayerful witnesses as their reasons for leaving. They look for voices of reason.
Peaceful and prayerful witness and offering tangible resources helps. Even pro-choice should have no problem with the tangible resources offered to the clients. Well, at least a voice of reason would think so.
Voices of reason must prevail in all child assault prevention. Just because a mob says there is a problem, does not necessarily mean that people will listen, nor should they. Mobs have their own agendas.. In child assault prevention, across the continuum, when the mob mentality rules, no one is saved and justice does not prevail. It doesn't help to yell "Crucify him."
In a nation that is outraged at the simplest things these days, the "culturally sensitive informed" showed no outrage when Kermit Gosnell sold drugs in his neighborhood and killed babies with scissors. Kermit Gosnell
Marian R. Carlino
July 5, 2018
Saturday, June 23, 2018
"B" and His Mom
The kid is dead….it was not good news.
When someone dies from drugs or violence, the veil of “he is at peace” is often used to cover the truth. The following is an editorial I wrote about the children who hung out at a house at the corner near mine. Not all of the kids were trouble makers, but some were troubled. One in particular suffered as a young child when his seemingly all together family (parents would hold hands and kiss in church at the sign of peace) was broken by divorce- infidelity. The father turned to a younger woman, and the mother turned to alcohol. Both turned away from their faith practice.
His obituary, when he died at the age of 25 in 2014, stated” his contagious smile and positive approach to life impacted so many people around him.” To come to grips with the death of a family member who was troubled, an obituary will list many falsehoods. The young man was troubled. My neighbor, who took offense at the editorial (below) because it was her house, told me once “this child has been on the streets since he was six.” That would have been about right, around the time the family broke up. Family and inner circle friends knew. He excelled at sports they said. Yes, he did. He “barked in the face of other team members” and was used as the lethal weapon against other teams. He was a troubled child who bullied others. People knew. Voices of concern ignored. His mother worked at the local school which was one reason he got away with behaviors which would have gotten other kids held accountable.
So, he is one of the kids who didn’t make it. People thought I didn’t care about him because I wanted him held accountable at hockey games, at school and in the neighborhood. The “barking” was something on which his coaches and I would disagree. A life of trouble. Some trouble he made for himself, some trouble was imposed on him. He is one kid I will never forget. His death is not romantic no matter how the obituary is spun. The adults in his life failed him. He failed himself, because he was a talented and very handsome young boy and young man. There is so much more to life when at a young age, people don’t abandon their children.
In 2015, an article on WHYY ran a picture of the bereaved mother of the deceased 25- year old. She was interviewed. Per the article, he was in and out of rehab from the age of 13. The phone call she received on the day of his death was that he committed suicide. He was addicted to heroin. She wants to help others now.
As an at- risk youth told me years ago, “my mom let me on my own at the age of 12. She is trying to make up for it now." He told me it was too late. He was right. He was apprehended during our program for holding people at knife point. His mom bailed him out and he came to see me after that to offer those words of wisdom.
I am posting this editorial. Maybe there will be some other neighbor who cares and is not ostracized for caring. I can still see those hockey games. It wasn’t a pretty picture. There have not been new pictures of this kid since 2014. The mother said she should have taken a picture of him in his coffin.
He was laid out at the funeral home owned by one of the hockey coaches with whom I would disagree- especially about alcohol. The kid was buried out of the church I attended. Sometimes the only time people visit a church is in a pine box.
If you want to help the future, don’t lie about the past.
Letter to The Current April 11, 2002
A few years ago, when I started addressing the issue of school violence publicly, I was often told that the outbreaks were “isolated incidents”. It seems that point of view has been proven wrong time and time again.
The extreme outbursts seem to be the result of small incidents being ignored to the point where the attention seekers do the worst to get their point across.
We see it worldwide. I can’t do a lot for the world in general, but I can do something about my children’s schools and neighborhood. So, I write and call the police when I think something is wrong.
A recent article about the Patterson juveniles who are now facing murder charges is a sad story. Last June, a group of teenagers went on a “wilding” spree. That is today’s jargon for a rampage. As a result, several people were injured and one person was murdered.
Could these incidents have been prevented? Monday morning quarterbacking would probably say, “Yes.”
Good teachers, coaches and even some experts would tell you that we are to learn from the mistakes of the “game” so we don’t make the same errors again. Therefore, I am asking the parents of the kids who hang out at the corner, near my house to take a good look at what is going on.
When the children leave your property and harass others living nearby, they just might be on the path to more trouble. Let your children know that there are some people in the neighborhood who care about them and don’t want their “minor mis-behaviors” to escalate to something more serious.
Marian R. Carlino
April 11, 2002
At the time I lived in S.P., NJ.
Letter to The Current April 11, 2002
A few years ago, when I started addressing the issue of school violence publicly, I was often told that the outbreaks were “isolated incidents”. It seems that point of view has been proven wrong time and time again.
The extreme outbursts seem to be the result of small incidents being ignored to the point where the attention seekers do the worst to get their point across.
We see it worldwide. I can’t do a lot for the world in general, but I can do something about my children’s schools and neighborhood. So, I write and call the police when I think something is wrong.
A recent article about the Patterson juveniles who are now facing murder charges is a sad story. Last June, a group of teenagers went on a “wilding” spree. That is today’s jargon for a rampage. As a result, several people were injured and one person was murdered.
Could these incidents have been prevented? Monday morning quarterbacking would probably say, “Yes.”
Good teachers, coaches and even some experts would tell you that we are to learn from the mistakes of the “game” so we don’t make the same errors again. Therefore, I am asking the parents of the kids who hang out at the corner, near my house to take a good look at what is going on.
When the children leave your property and harass others living nearby, they just might be on the path to more trouble. Let your children know that there are some people in the neighborhood who care about them and don’t want their “minor mis-behaviors” to escalate to something more serious.
Marian R. Carlino
April 11, 2002
At the time I lived in S.P., NJ.
Coffee cups can hold more then just plain coffee.
Michael and Mrs. Weinstein
An ordinary murder-
This editorial was published in The Current on March 28, 2007
It may have been just an “ordinary murder” except for the fact that a teacher admired by her family, friends and colleagues had the presence of mind to record the events leading up to her death.
Therefore, in death, she probably reached more people than she would have in a lifetime of classroom teaching. And although the young man did not listen to her pleas for sparing her life, she did save his life. Her words, recorded, led to her murderer's apprehension. Without being captured, one can only imagine where he may have ended up had he not been stopped.
Who knows how many more people he may have killed or if he would have been killed himself. He is in prison, but there are worse places than that to spend one’s life. He is still a young man who may never see freedom again, but he can change his heart which was something Kathleen Weinstein tried to convince him to do.
Mrs. Weinstein’s colleagues can learn something from her last words and actions also. The fact that Mrs. Weinstein recorded the conversation indicates that she wanted someone to hear it. One of her former colleagues stated in The Press (AC) article "and I believe that she wouldn’t have told on him. She would have probably tried to help him. She was the kind of person that when she gave her word, she meant it.”
No one can help another human being by hiding the crime committed. Mrs. Weinstein would have told. Her recordings prove that. And in that recording is also proof of her commitment to being kind. For there is nothing kind about letting people get away with murder. We can all learn a lesson from Mrs. Weinstein.
Marian R. Carlino
Published in The Current March 28, 2007.
A high school student wanted her car and abducted her and killed her. It happened in 1996. It made the news again in 2007.
The principal of the killer said he was a high school sophomore and “described as average” and “not known for disciplinary problems.”
He went to plead guilty in 1997 per the article, but in 2007 he retracted his statement and had a new trial. His first attorney had an affair with the mother. He tried to argue it was not his voice on the tape.
DAVID AND ME
The mother, in this scenario let The Press know…the result was a public response:
Just like the mother of the child with whom I worked (violent behavior, violent drawings), the parent of a troubled child took to the public to voice concerns. The mother of my student went to a bar and shared my workshop request. How do I know? Other parents told me. They were some of the parents who wrote their own letters of concern so many years ago.
Since the mother of a child in Dennis Township, NJ went public, some of us responded. Here is my response. And below it, is a response with another point of view to my opinion. I remember Mork and Mindy. I taught first grade at the time. "NaNoo NaNoo". Unfortunately, "Mork" is dead now too.
School’s concern was well founded—
Regarding the October 20 story- “Stick figure sketch lands boy, 7, on school suspension”:
(The stick figure drawing was published.)
The drawing shows very clearly that one named person is at the receiving end of another person with a gun. I would like to congratulate the child who did the right thing regarding school safety. According to the article, the child who was given this picture on the school bus gave it to his parents, who then contacted the school. The Dennis Township school district then took action, based on a policy set in place because of the extremes in school violence nationwide.
Every child and adult in every school has the right to be safe. When anyone, child or adult, violates the right to be safe, action may and should be taken. In this case, a picture is worth a thousand words. If a person stated that I am going to kill you, even without a weapon, only a foolish person would not take action.
Some may disagree with the type or amount of consequences given for a poor choice, but consequences do occur naturally and logically. Now the school district should find out why the incident occurred. The mother (of the offending child), who chose to go public with her complaints, should be grateful for the concern shown and should work with the school to solve the problem.
Marian R. Carlino
Two other editorials thought the school district over reacted. One is included below. People talked about the issue on the radio too. Both writers assumed a suspension was done before talking to the parents.
Let’s lighten up on boy’s sketch
How complicated was the behavior of the second-grader who was suspended for a day because his art work included a stick figure hold a weapon pointed at another stick figure?
Did he know about the zero tolerance policy? Was he crying for help? Or was he concerned about the president’s veto of the State Children’s Health Insurance Program?
He’s 7 years old, for God’s sake.
Anthony Notturno
Villas
The drawing shows very clearly that one named person is at the receiving end of another person with a gun. I would like to congratulate the child who did the right thing regarding school safety. According to the article, the child who was given this picture on the school bus gave it to his parents, who then contacted the school. The Dennis Township school district then took action, based on a policy set in place because of the extremes in school violence nationwide.
Every child and adult in every school has the right to be safe. When anyone, child or adult, violates the right to be safe, action may and should be taken. In this case, a picture is worth a thousand words. If a person stated that I am going to kill you, even without a weapon, only a foolish person would not take action.
Some may disagree with the type or amount of consequences given for a poor choice, but consequences do occur naturally and logically. Now the school district should find out why the incident occurred. The mother (of the offending child), who chose to go public with her complaints, should be grateful for the concern shown and should work with the school to solve the problem.
Marian R. Carlino
October 10, 2007
The stick figure had a boy’s name David with another stick figure, named, Me holding a gun at the back of the David stick figure.
This is a response from a reader online: (spelling errors of the response are not corrected)
This is a response from a reader online: (spelling errors of the response are not corrected)
No, Marian Carlino is an idiot who writes to the papers
frequently and spouts off nonsense. She
doesn’t understand that a 7 year old doesn’t posess the cognitive skills or
thought processes to sit and form intent that was alleged by the stupendously
stupid school district. The only danger
here was the risk of a paper cut. This
was a typical knee-jerk reaction by a bunch of morons who biggest concern is to
wrap up a days work in time to get home and watch Mork and Mindy reruns on TV
Land.
I hope this childs mother sues tha pants off the school
district and wins millions. Maybe then
voters will think twice before electing morons to the school board who make
stupid policies and actually elect a few people with intelligence. What was needed here was a careful, measured
response. Would it have killed the principal
to talk to the child and parent? Maybe
do a little education, you know, like schools are supposed to do. Posted by Scott on Sat Oct 27, 2007 2:19 pm
Two other editorials thought the school district over reacted. One is included below. People talked about the issue on the radio too. Both writers assumed a suspension was done before talking to the parents.
Let’s lighten up on boy’s sketch
How complicated was the behavior of the second-grader who was suspended for a day because his art work included a stick figure hold a weapon pointed at another stick figure?
Did he know about the zero tolerance policy? Was he crying for help? Or was he concerned about the president’s veto of the State Children’s Health Insurance Program?
He’s 7 years old, for God’s sake.
Anthony Notturno
Villas
How many people lightened up on Cruz, (not Tom) or the Columbine killers, or all the others- when they were 7?
Young children form intent.
Marian R. Carlino
June 23, 2018
Sunday, June 17, 2018
Marion Rose and Me: Never Shall We Forget
It took Elie Wiesel ten years to write his memoirs of the Holocaust. School children across America read Night (1960), one of his many books. Elie Wiesel did not want the world to forget about the horrors of the concentration camps. His work led him to international fame for his teachings and writings. He wanted the world to know so it wouldn't happen again, and yet so it does.
As I am writing this and looking at a biography of his life, I have just learned that his wife's name was Marion Rose. They had a son named Elisha.
I understand his passion. I shall never forget about the loss of life in our schools. And I connect the dots to abortion because abortion victims, as were the holocaust victims, are targeted and not random. Abortion supporters send the message that it is okay to kill. Abortion has ties to the mentality that led to the Holocaust. Do the school shooters?
The Nazi's targeted youth to help do their dirty work. So, to whom are the teen killers listening? Do they create their scenarios without researching others. Reporters and researchers are finding the shooters research previous mass shootings. One in particular is the Columbine massacre. Cruz in Parkland, Florida (used guns) and Hribal, Murrysville, Pa ( used knives) idolized the Columbine killers.
After I left teaching, I did read all sorts of documentation and resources. Before I left, I paid attention during the 1997-98 school year, which is one reason why I spoke out for my own class and school. I was given one book to read on dealing with children with oppositional defiance disorder (catch all term). None of the recommendations involved using happy faces. Most of the recommendations involved extensive therapy and hospitalization.
I was not familiar with the word "copy cat" as it came to school shootings during the 1997-98 school year.. I just felt that the child with whom I worked fit the profile of children who were shooting in their schools.. I now understand the term, "copy cat." Many of the school shooters reference the Columbine killers. Nineteen years after their horrific plans of violence (that did not come to full fruition), the Columbine effect is a valid term.
The Columbine massacre happened just four days before I was supposed to speak at NJEA event for an appeal. I brought the newspaper to my testimony. Students and one teacher dead and others injured seriously. I remember the young man dangling out of the window waiting for help. And one fat man at the talk on April 24, 1999 had the nerve to laugh when I spoke. My child asked me why.
I had no explanation other than his ignorance. We can't afford to be ignorant.
Elie Wiesel had a world stage with his message. He wrote, taught and spoke to get the message across. He had victim impact testimony as did Anne Frank.
As people turned to gun control as a main way of dealing with the Columbine massacre, there were those who actually were doing research and then those, like me, reading the information. I had lots of newspaper articles saved for many years, then I started clearing them out. But the web is full of information.
As the ignorant blame the guns and are marching for gun control, they are not reading the history. Trains were a weapon used in Nazi Germany... how else would they transport millions of people to their deaths? Elie Wiesel did not advocate the banning of trains.
So through the years, Columbine has been a steady subject of interest in the news. Other posts have additional articles.
2013:
https://www.cnn.com/2013/09/18/us/columbine-high-school-shootings-fast-facts/index.html
In 2001, after a "America has witnessed a wave of shootings at its high schools", 60 Minutes did an update. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/what-really-happened-at-columbine/
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/columbine-were-there-warning-signs/
Slate Magazine in 2004 had this expose. http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/assessment/2004/04/the_depressive_and_the_psychopath.html
A section of the piece:
"School shooters tend to act impulsively and attack the targets of their rage: students and faculty. But Harris and Klebold planned for a year and dreamed much bigger. The school served as means to a grander end, to terrorize the entire nation by attacking a symbol of American life. Their slaughter was aimed at students and teachers, but it was not motivated by resentment of them in particular. Students and teachers were just convenient quarry, what Timothy McVeigh described as "collateral damage."
The killers, in fact, laughed at petty school shooters. They bragged about dwarfing the carnage of the Oklahoma City bombing and originally scheduled their bloody performance for its anniversary (which was April 19). Klebold boasted on video about inflicting "the most deaths in U.S. history." Columbine was intended not primarily as a shooting at all, but as a bombing on a massive scale. If they hadn't been so bad at wiring the timers, the propane bombs they set in the cafeteria would have wiped out 600 people. After those bombs went off, they planned to gun down fleeing survivors. An explosive third act would follow, when their cars, packed with still more bombs, would rip through still more crowds, presumably of survivors, rescue workers, and reporters. The climax would be captured on live television. It wasn't just "fame" they were after—Agent Fuselier bristles at that trivializing term—they were gunning for devastating infamy on the historical scale of an Attila the Hun. Their vision was to create a nightmare so devastating and apocalyptic that the entire world would shudder at their power.
Harris and Klebold would have been dismayed that Columbine was dubbed the "worst school shooting in American history." They set their sights on eclipsing the world's greatest mass murderers, but the media never saw past the choice of venue. The school setting drove analysis in precisely the wrong direction.
Fuselier and Ochberg say that if you want to understand "the killers," quit asking what drove them. Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold were radically different individuals, with vastly different motives and opposite mental conditions. Klebold is easier to comprehend, a more familiar type. He was hotheaded, but depressive and suicidal. He blamed himself for his problems.
Harris is the challenge. He was sweet-faced and well-spoken. Adults, and even some other kids, described him as "nice." But Harris was cold, calculating, and homicidal. "Klebold was hurting inside while Harris wanted to hurt people," Fuselier says. Harris was not merely a troubled kid, the psychiatrists say, he was a psychopath. "
April 20 is Hitler's birthday.
As at the high school in Parkland, Florida, a "deputy and six other policemen took positions but none of the entered the school." ( CBS article) Training after Columbine was supposed to fix that. As did the sheriff in Parkland, Florida, the sheriff of Jefferson County, Sheriff Stone said his deputies did as they were trained to do. So, don't expect success when the Swat team is called in.
The news is constantly full of success stories too in which people did speak up and tragedy was prevented. But we tend to listen to the people who failed to prevent the shootings. Knowing warning signs and speaking up- persistently.
These articles listed above, and the many articles published already about the high school in Parkland, Florida, show the complete failure on the part of the schools and the police to do their jobs. Students from Parkland, Florida are marching to the wrong drum beat. They should be attending every school board meeting and city counsel meeting in their own community to get answers and demand change.
Holocausts and massacres happen on the world stage when people don't pay attention to what is happening in their own homes and communities. "Hitler youth"- alive and well and living in our schools, planning the next massacre. Some of them use guns.
Two years after Columbine, a small group of terrorists actually succeeded in pulling off part of the Columbine killers' plan. That was deemed to be a massive failure to read the warning signs too.
The whole world is a stage, some actors are deadly. We held the German citizens and the terrorists families and countries accountable for letting the holocaust and 9/11 happen. Yet, we allow the school personnel and police keep their jobs despite their failures. We make the failures "voices of reason". School personnel should be held accountable for not speaking up before a shooting.
The leaders are charging, while the leadership sleeps. There isn't a happy face sticker in the world which can stop the bleed. But making sure there is accountability for following the many laws on school safety may be motivation to do more then protect the guilty.
Many of the victim's parents who wanted answers after Columbine were ostracized for speaking up.
The trains took the victims and people looked on. There are Holocaust deniers today.
Like Marion Rose (Wiesel), I will never forget. I will be persistent in speaking up.
Marian Rose Carlino
June 17, 2018
As I am writing this and looking at a biography of his life, I have just learned that his wife's name was Marion Rose. They had a son named Elisha.
I understand his passion. I shall never forget about the loss of life in our schools. And I connect the dots to abortion because abortion victims, as were the holocaust victims, are targeted and not random. Abortion supporters send the message that it is okay to kill. Abortion has ties to the mentality that led to the Holocaust. Do the school shooters?
The Nazi's targeted youth to help do their dirty work. So, to whom are the teen killers listening? Do they create their scenarios without researching others. Reporters and researchers are finding the shooters research previous mass shootings. One in particular is the Columbine massacre. Cruz in Parkland, Florida (used guns) and Hribal, Murrysville, Pa ( used knives) idolized the Columbine killers.
After I left teaching, I did read all sorts of documentation and resources. Before I left, I paid attention during the 1997-98 school year, which is one reason why I spoke out for my own class and school. I was given one book to read on dealing with children with oppositional defiance disorder (catch all term). None of the recommendations involved using happy faces. Most of the recommendations involved extensive therapy and hospitalization.
I was not familiar with the word "copy cat" as it came to school shootings during the 1997-98 school year.. I just felt that the child with whom I worked fit the profile of children who were shooting in their schools.. I now understand the term, "copy cat." Many of the school shooters reference the Columbine killers. Nineteen years after their horrific plans of violence (that did not come to full fruition), the Columbine effect is a valid term.
The Columbine massacre happened just four days before I was supposed to speak at NJEA event for an appeal. I brought the newspaper to my testimony. Students and one teacher dead and others injured seriously. I remember the young man dangling out of the window waiting for help. And one fat man at the talk on April 24, 1999 had the nerve to laugh when I spoke. My child asked me why.
I had no explanation other than his ignorance. We can't afford to be ignorant.
Elie Wiesel had a world stage with his message. He wrote, taught and spoke to get the message across. He had victim impact testimony as did Anne Frank.
As people turned to gun control as a main way of dealing with the Columbine massacre, there were those who actually were doing research and then those, like me, reading the information. I had lots of newspaper articles saved for many years, then I started clearing them out. But the web is full of information.
As the ignorant blame the guns and are marching for gun control, they are not reading the history. Trains were a weapon used in Nazi Germany... how else would they transport millions of people to their deaths? Elie Wiesel did not advocate the banning of trains.
So through the years, Columbine has been a steady subject of interest in the news. Other posts have additional articles.
2013:
https://www.cnn.com/2013/09/18/us/columbine-high-school-shootings-fast-facts/index.html
In 2001, after a "America has witnessed a wave of shootings at its high schools", 60 Minutes did an update. https://www.cbsnews.com/news/what-really-happened-at-columbine/
https://www.cbsnews.com/news/columbine-were-there-warning-signs/
Slate Magazine in 2004 had this expose. http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/assessment/2004/04/the_depressive_and_the_psychopath.html
A section of the piece:
"School shooters tend to act impulsively and attack the targets of their rage: students and faculty. But Harris and Klebold planned for a year and dreamed much bigger. The school served as means to a grander end, to terrorize the entire nation by attacking a symbol of American life. Their slaughter was aimed at students and teachers, but it was not motivated by resentment of them in particular. Students and teachers were just convenient quarry, what Timothy McVeigh described as "collateral damage."
The killers, in fact, laughed at petty school shooters. They bragged about dwarfing the carnage of the Oklahoma City bombing and originally scheduled their bloody performance for its anniversary (which was April 19). Klebold boasted on video about inflicting "the most deaths in U.S. history." Columbine was intended not primarily as a shooting at all, but as a bombing on a massive scale. If they hadn't been so bad at wiring the timers, the propane bombs they set in the cafeteria would have wiped out 600 people. After those bombs went off, they planned to gun down fleeing survivors. An explosive third act would follow, when their cars, packed with still more bombs, would rip through still more crowds, presumably of survivors, rescue workers, and reporters. The climax would be captured on live television. It wasn't just "fame" they were after—Agent Fuselier bristles at that trivializing term—they were gunning for devastating infamy on the historical scale of an Attila the Hun. Their vision was to create a nightmare so devastating and apocalyptic that the entire world would shudder at their power.
Harris and Klebold would have been dismayed that Columbine was dubbed the "worst school shooting in American history." They set their sights on eclipsing the world's greatest mass murderers, but the media never saw past the choice of venue. The school setting drove analysis in precisely the wrong direction.
Fuselier and Ochberg say that if you want to understand "the killers," quit asking what drove them. Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold were radically different individuals, with vastly different motives and opposite mental conditions. Klebold is easier to comprehend, a more familiar type. He was hotheaded, but depressive and suicidal. He blamed himself for his problems.
Harris is the challenge. He was sweet-faced and well-spoken. Adults, and even some other kids, described him as "nice." But Harris was cold, calculating, and homicidal. "Klebold was hurting inside while Harris wanted to hurt people," Fuselier says. Harris was not merely a troubled kid, the psychiatrists say, he was a psychopath. "
April 20 is Hitler's birthday.
As at the high school in Parkland, Florida, a "deputy and six other policemen took positions but none of the entered the school." ( CBS article) Training after Columbine was supposed to fix that. As did the sheriff in Parkland, Florida, the sheriff of Jefferson County, Sheriff Stone said his deputies did as they were trained to do. So, don't expect success when the Swat team is called in.
The news is constantly full of success stories too in which people did speak up and tragedy was prevented. But we tend to listen to the people who failed to prevent the shootings. Knowing warning signs and speaking up- persistently.
These articles listed above, and the many articles published already about the high school in Parkland, Florida, show the complete failure on the part of the schools and the police to do their jobs. Students from Parkland, Florida are marching to the wrong drum beat. They should be attending every school board meeting and city counsel meeting in their own community to get answers and demand change.
Holocausts and massacres happen on the world stage when people don't pay attention to what is happening in their own homes and communities. "Hitler youth"- alive and well and living in our schools, planning the next massacre. Some of them use guns.
Two years after Columbine, a small group of terrorists actually succeeded in pulling off part of the Columbine killers' plan. That was deemed to be a massive failure to read the warning signs too.
The whole world is a stage, some actors are deadly. We held the German citizens and the terrorists families and countries accountable for letting the holocaust and 9/11 happen. Yet, we allow the school personnel and police keep their jobs despite their failures. We make the failures "voices of reason". School personnel should be held accountable for not speaking up before a shooting.
The leaders are charging, while the leadership sleeps. There isn't a happy face sticker in the world which can stop the bleed. But making sure there is accountability for following the many laws on school safety may be motivation to do more then protect the guilty.
Many of the victim's parents who wanted answers after Columbine were ostracized for speaking up.
The trains took the victims and people looked on. There are Holocaust deniers today.
Like Marion Rose (Wiesel), I will never forget. I will be persistent in speaking up.
Marian Rose Carlino
June 17, 2018
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