An idea that led to a soap opera in my life.
I never expect anything of anyone else that I would not do myself within my skills or true abilities. I am thankful for people who put themselves in harms way to protect me. I am not brave enough to do some jobs. But the ones I take on, I do with respect for myself and others.
What was my idea?
I wrote a workshop request using a child’s initials. My proactive concerns for prevention led to conflict which is prime material for a soap opera. My story did not start with a shooting or end with one. Maybe that is what some people wanted? I do know some wanted me to go away.
Right before I left teaching, a soap opera, on steroids for me anyway, started in my life. It ran from early 1998 to 2008. Some details are in my book. The editors had a problem with the original length, so I had to leave out chapters. Frankly, I thought some details such as including more of the closed door hearing documentation from 1998, could have been included, but a narrative was suggested. 126 pages of the closed hearing are still intact and timely. I left most details of another significant season in my life out, even without editor input, but that topic can play into societal violence too.
Soap operas involve conflict. The juicy parts make people tune in. Conflict runs through each chapter, episode and season. Season finales usually signal conflict resolution, the writers just run out of relatable ideas, or someone dies even if in a dream.
School Violence and divorce, the main topics of my soap opera run, were also about conflict. In my professional and personal life, conflict resolution did occur, with, and despite, the help of lawyers. No killing occurred in any season. That is not due to luck. I saw patterns in the scenes unfolding in my class/school and in my personal life. I connected dots in 1998 in my class. And, I had one good friend who helped connect dots in 2005 at some risk to himself. He helped write the end of the season of 2004 to 2005. My dear “co/writer” died in 2025. He will remain forever in my heart.
Divorce can factor into violence which can impact our schools and communities. TV soap operas always have both in their story lines.. How many years did Days of Our Lives run?
Ironically, a real deadly soap opera occurred in the life of a former coworker a few years after I left teaching with her. She came into my class, daily, in the 1996-1997 and 1997-1998 school years so we were close until April 22, 1998. Her soap opera, in which she has a unwelcome role, made it to 20/20 on national TV. 20/20, what a unique name for a show highlighting failures in real life.
Sometimes, the good doctor in a soap opera is really an SOB. It was less than a six degrees of separation to my life not only because of my coworker. Sometimes we know several supporting characters who at some point we are in life with. Fortunately, my former coworker got out of that part of her soap opera a few years before a deadly turn of events. But it is part of her story.
How does that soap opera relate to this discussion? You know the day the climatic murder of a spouse happened, a block away from a high school in an upscale neighborhood, no one locked down the nearby high school. No one thought to do a lockdown out of precaution? This was well after Columbine.
No one thought the good doctor was the type to swindle insurance companies, deal elicit drugs, or murder his wife. No one? No patterns? I also knew one of his trusted staff members. No one caught on?
And the day the murder happened, the information was that an unknown murderer was at large. And no one, again I ask, no one thought to lock down the school? It was a good thing he only had one victim in mind that day. He had divorced one wife. Why didn’t he just divorce the second one?
The lack of conflict resolution in this soap opera impacted the entire area and engaged local, state and national media. That is just like a school shooting when conflict is not resolved peacefully.. The impact on a community at large is life changing. Media loves to cover the damage.
Like many school shooters who take their own lives, this good doctor took his own life (while in jail). (They say.)
Good ideas involve conflict resolution without weapons. TV soap operas are based on life. Some real life ones are horror stories and the devil is in the details.
More to come.
MarianR. Carlino
May 29, 2026